Why Hot Guys and Girls Are Like Red Meat - They Will Kill You in the Long Run
Last week, I got a call from a distraught woman named Michelle. Early 40’s, attractive, intelligent, funny – and utterly demoralized by this guy that she’d been seeing. They had a passionate first month, and then, after one awkward conversation, he pulled away. But not fully. He would still send her regular texts saying that he missed her – although he didn’t actually DO anything to make plans with her.
Having read my advice before, Michelle set up a coaching call to find out how she could get this guy back.
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Since Michelle knew a lot about nutrition, I decided to communicate with her in metaphors she’d easily understand. I told her that the super-attractive guys with whom she felt the most chemistry were like fried foods – they may taste really good, but, in the long run, they’re really bad for you.
Her immediate reaction was to protest, “But nice guys are so boring!”
“So are vegetables,” I said. “But if you want to live a long, healthy life, you can’t do better than eating healthy. If you think that you’re going to be the one person who doesn’t get heart disease on a steady diet of bad food, you’ve got another thing coming.”
She laughed. “But I LIKE bad food.”
“EVERYBODY likes bad food,” I reminded her. “But if you want to know the main reason that you’re single, it’s because you keep on eating steak every night and are continually shocked that you don’t lose weight. Steak is always gonna be bad for you. Hot, emotionally unavailable guys will, too.”
That conversation was four days ago.
Here’s what Michelle wrote to me this morning:
Hello Evan;
I cannot begin to tell you what a difference our conversation has made in my life. I am so extremely grateful to you. I walked into two of my clients’ houses yesterday and they said, “What’s his name?” because they said I was glowing and luminous. They’ve only seen me look like that before when I was infatuated with a new man. But I now feel this way because a huge weight has been lifted and I have a new path and outlook for my future. Do you have any idea how HUGE that is? I hope I just gave you the compliment of the year because that is BIG stuff; to make that kind of a difference with one phone conversation. And I’m a tough sell… so take the compliment
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